It’s Day 8 of NaBloPoMo, and my theme of choice is Police Encounters.  Yesterday I dished all about my mother-in-law, and how I wish someone would lock her up for criminal gift giving.

I couldn’t tell you what on Earth possessed me to pick Police Encounters as one of my NaBloPoMo themes.  To write about something, you usually have to experience it first, and I’m basically a police virgin.

I guess there’s the time I went on a police ride-a-long for my Criminal Law class in law school.  Does that count as an encounter? I was trying to make conversation with the officer, so I asked casually whether there were certain types of cars they tend to pull over more than others.  You know, the theory that red cars get more speeding tickets?  Well,  turns out he was really offended by that question.  Oops.

Truthfully, I’ve almost never even been pulled over.  I have no idea how I’ve escaped a lifetime of speeding tickets, since I’ve always had a bit of a lead foot.  Apparently it has nothing to do with the fact that I was driving a super un-sexy tan Toyota Corolla most of my formative years.

So I was 29 the first time I was ever pulled over.  It was right after K-Man was born, and my dad was in the car with me.  Super embarrassing.  I didn’t even know what to do, I had to be coached on where to pull over, how to turn on my hazards, etc.  The officer had stopped me because one of my headlights was out.  But then I got reamed for having an out-of-state license when I had been living in the new state for almost three years.  I guess you’re supposed to get an updated license within 30 days of moving.  Oops.

The second and last time I was ever pulled over was, hilariously, only a few days after the first time.  It was night time and I was driving home from Panera Bread with dinner for Hubby and I.  I was exhausted, and I was literally 100 feet away from my house when I saw the flashing lights in my rear view mirror.  Again? What? This time, I had forgotten to turn on my headlights.  Face palm!  Gotta love when the officer asked me if I had been drinking.  I must have looked like shit.  I remember thinking, I CAN’T DRINK ,YOU IDIOT, DON’T YOU KNOW I’M BREASTFEEDING?  Yeah, I don’t know why he would have known that.  Driving while exhausted should be illegal, though, that’s for sure.

So that’s it.  Those are my police encounters.  I guess I’m not the bad ass I thought I was when I dreamed up today’s theme.  I guess I’m just a good girl.  How boring!

Until next time,

Vee